Don't Forget To Switch Off Your Sets..

Last Friday, 20th December, a meeting at the London Borough of Hammersmith & Fulham passed final planning permission for developers Stanhope Plc to finally kill off the biggest UK television icon in the world.

All plans for the "redevelopment" of the former BBC Television Centre on Wood Lane have been approved.

Main studios TC4 to TC8 and all the other smaller studios will be demolished, making way for hotels, houses and retail. The East tower will be replaced by a newer version. In order to maintain a BBC presence on the site and to give an acknowledgement to its former use, BBC Studios & Post Production and BBC Worldwide will move back in and rent space at either end of the site. Namely TC1 thru TC3 and Stage 6.

The Main Reception will become the hotel lobby.

Okay, television of sorts will still be made there, but the whole ambiance of the place has died. No more trips down to stores to plead for a bit of kit. No more quick visits to the bar whilst the lights are tweaked. No more television village. 

Management and former management have all stated to the press that TV Centre was passed it's sell by date, and everything needed replacing. 

Really? 

Why, then, has most of the studio kit been sent to Elstree to fit out the studio spaces there? Why, then, were the studios at TC always in demand by productions inside and outside of the BBC?

TC 8 was the last big studio built and was the home to some of the best UK comedies and audience shows. Producers loved the place. It was always busy, however, it will soon be a memory... and a couple of dozen 3 bedroom houses. 

The studios generated money for the BBC and I'm sure when TC1 to 3 are reopened they'll do the same again. I'm no mathematician but surely 8 studios generating an income is better than 3?

I can only assume that John Birt is laughing so much at the demise of television production at the BBC that he is sat in a pool of his own piss. He was the man who brought in Producer Choice and priced the BBC out of its own studios. He's the man who charged different BBC directorates to work in BBC buildings. He's the man who created a charging system for BBC producers to borrow material from the BBC music library... making it so expensive that those BBC producers just went out and bought the CD from HMV instead. He came close to destroying the BBC. Mark Thompson succeeded in hammering down the last few nails in its coffin. I should also remind people here that it was Greg 'The Saviour' Dyke who approved the idea that all the newsrooms should move back across London to BH.

When I was at school I was called a specky four eyed twat. This has nothing to do with the picture above and if any similarities are noticed then it's purely coincidental.

The BBC was big, it did need to be pruned but not at the expense of its main core product.Television.

The selling of Broadcasting House in Central London would have made much more money for the BBC. The moving of its network radio stations across to TV Centre would have cost a fraction of the billion pounds spent building the NBH extension and moving News there. NBH is ugly. It's like an ultra modern conservatory bolted to the side of a nice looking Art Deco manor house.

The BBC just doesn't seem bothered about making television anymore. It's main concern is its news division - the new DG was a major part of that 'minor' division - which is probably the main reason why it's TC that's been sacrificed rather than BH. 

News doesn't make money. Programme sales do. Indies make most of the BBC output nowadays, and the BBC want them to make more. Therefore will the potential income generated by selling BBC programmes start reducing? Is the BBC destined to become like Channel 4 - a publisher/broadcaster?

If you've ever loved television, I mean really loved it, the way it was crafted, the way it was crewed, the way it was edited, then you'll appreciate what a really big loss to UK television the closure of this site is. It's not just the bricks and mortar, it's the whole feel of the place. It was television. I've worked in other studios, like Teddington, Granada and TLS, and they just didn't have the same atmosphere. 

Maybe I'm just biased because of my BBC connection, but one thing is certain. We will never see another television building as well designed, loved, loathed, used, cared for and mistreated like this.

BBC Television Centre, 1956-2013

An Apology.... I'm really really sorry...

It takes a great man to admit he was wrong. And it takes a greater man to hold his hands up and apologise.

Today, that man is me.

Humble pie is on the menu.

Against the odds and after my comments and feelings over the past seven years I have to admit that I am absolutely bloody well loving the London Olympics!

There, I said it.

I, Keith Jacobsen, am actually enjoying the Olympics.

Not too long ago I wanted to avoid everything to do with the games. Even the thought of the torch relay made me shudder and think "oh for fu......"

I would dread the morning job sheet coming out just in case it was anything to do with torches, athletes or Sebastian Coe.

Then it happened. I was sent to Chester for the torch relay. I ran with Beth Tweddle while she carried the torch. I say "ran" but it was more of a wobbly, wheezy, sweaty jog with a large camera and ruck sack. Someone in the crowd that lined the route shouted encouragement at me "try and keep up you fat bastard!" but I genuinely had quite good fun.

Perhaps this was just a one off? Euphoria from the heat maybe? Or the blood trying to make my head and heart burst open...?

Then the torch relay reached my home town, Liverpool. Something strange started to happen. I wanted to go and cover the story. I actually did a little jump for joy when I got sent on the torch relay that day.

Yes, I did give it back... 

I was beginning to get Olympic fever. OMG!

The Torch Special programme that we did from Liverpool on BBC1 was absolutely fantastic - even if I did say so myself. The sun was shining, the crowds were out en masse and the shot of the programme came from my friend Martyn Souter who was doing Steadicam on the Mersey Ferry. He followed the torch bearer, a local bloke called Craig Lundberg - a former soldier who was blinded and seriously injured by an RPG attack whilst serving in Iraq.

Nothing else needs to be said...

I found myself overcome with emotion. I was so proud of this brave guy, so proud that my city turned out in force to cheer him on and incredibly proud of our production. Martyn - you nailed it matey! Scousers - you're always the best! And Craig - you definitely deserved the applause. You are an inspiration and have certainly made me have a better outlook on life.

Asked what he was going to do with his torch he replied, in typical Scouse wit, "Well I can't see on my mantle piece can I, so I 'm going to give it to Liverpool museum so Liverpool people can see it". Class.

Then the torch left on the rest of it's trip round the country and my Olympic fever began to die down. Phew... not as soft as shite as I thought.  

I got back to normal jobs, nothing to do with Olympics or torches. Murders, accidents, court cases - the usual daily helping of television news. Olympic accrediations were applied for, rotas drawn up and I managed to keep my head down and not get asked to go to that there London. Woo hoo!

Then last Thursday my programme editor collared me and begged me to go to London and shoot/edit a piece about the Mens Cycle Road Race - one Mr M. Cavandish lives in our patch. I groaned. I didn't think I'd get accreditation in time so I agreed. 

I did get accredited. 

Shit. 

While the entire population of the world settled down to watch the opening ceremony I drove down the M1 to London. I got to my hotel in Elstree just in time to see the torch being lit and Paul McCartney murder Hey Jude. "Hmmm" I thought.. "no celebs lighting it... that makes a change."

Sleep, then next morning off to London - still not knowing where I was going to be filming. Then the call came. 

"You want me to film where??" I stammered. 

If you're going to have a live point, you may as well have a good one!

I was outside Buckingham Palace, with accreditation and a free Oyster card loaded with £90 worth of credit on it. Thanks Boris!

My reporter was Andy Johnson and we were right in the middle of the Manx Massive - all cheering on for Mark Cavandish. What was that feeling? Olympic fever started to build up again. 

The changing of the guard happened - you could tell the foreigners and the Brits. The foreigners all dashed for the front gates of Buck House to snap pictures of the guards. The Brits just looked over the top of their copies of the Independent (other broadsheets available), smiled and went back to reading! 

The guards were AM-AZ-ING... they played the theme to Chariots of Fire while they marched in slow motion. Brilliant! Then as they got into the Palace they played the James Bond theme and Goldfinger! I was welling up again. This is my country! A wave of patriotism washed over me and something clicked. 

I completely 'got' what London 2012 was all about and why it was so hotly anticipated.

Hard at work! Picture taken by my friend, ITN cameraman Mark Nelson

It wasn't a chore anymore. It was an 'experience' and I can tell my children that I was there. I was outside the Palace with Andy for 6 hours waiting for what would hopefully be the first of the many gold medals in OUR Olympics. I had my Olympic app running keeping up to date with every last moment of the race.

It wasn't to be. I was gutted for the guys. I was gutted for the Manx Massive. Their kids were disappointed but they seemed to have had a really good day. Everyone did. That was sport. Some you win, some you lose.

The patriotism surged through me. 

I was hooked. I began to regret all the negativity that I spouted since London won the bid. I still think Lord Coe is a tit and Jeremy Hunt is a bell end (literally - check out YouTube), but I had an amazing time with the people of the world. 

with reporter, Andy Johnson

I have been glued to the coverage ever since. I cheer for Team GB. I screamed at the monitor in the edit suite when Gemma Gibbons was in the final of the Judo, although not as loud as the "lady" in the edit suite next to me who was heard to yell "kick her fucking head in Gemma!". 

Our (the BBC) coverage has been brilliant. Well done to every single operator on every single OB. Not all of it was perfect - I don't think anyone expects it to be 100% perfect, but bloody hell, how many cameras and how much live telly are we doing? Credit where its due.

I am now looking forward to taking up cycling again, I may even get a shotgun and start shooting and if Rebecca Addlington would teach me to swim (please...!! x) I would take up that AND canoeing too!

I get it. This is pure, real sport. All these guys and girls are there to take part in their chosen events. They're not there because of contractual necessity, the large pay packet or the prize money (none of either). They are there because they are the best of the best in their country and want to win the ultimate accolade of being an Olympic World Champion. I salute you all and I am so very pleased that you have succeeded in reaching the game of your lives, in your own country and for some of you, your home city.

So, Premiership footballers who are tweeting your support for Team GB  - here's a challenge. Why not donate one week of your obscenely large pay packet to a young British athlete? It's means an incredibly tacky bit of jewellery or a stupid big car to you, but to them it would pay for 6 months training. They wouldn't have to spend time trying to raise sponsorship to get to heats or to buy time in training facilities.

Just imagine if they could just concentrate on the training, not worrying how they are going to pay for the trip to an event or if they can afford a new pair of trainers and become even better than they are at these games. Imagine Team GB at the TOP of the medals table. Messers Rooney, Terry, Lampard et el... you could help achieve that.

But I doubt you have the balls to do that, do you?

TV Centre - Sold to the man with the bulldozer

It was announced by the DG, Mark 'The Hatchet' Thompson, that the contracts have been exchanged today that will see BBC Television Centre sold to a property developer for the sum of £200 million.

That's not a great deal of money for some prime real estate in West London. It's not  great deal of money for a landmark piece of architecture. Its not a great deal of money for much these days, but Stanhope plc have been the successful bidder in the purchase process.

The foundation stone inside TVC

As yet no-one knows what their plans are for the site - they have quite a portfolio of buildings and projects in the capital and according to their corporate website one of their "partners" is BSkyB (prop. R Murdoch). So could we see the dirty digger moving his broadcast empire (see also complete load of shite) into the soon to be vacated W12 7RJ? Doubtful, but at least television would still be made there.

Those of you who aren't in TV probably couldn't give a fat flying monkeys arse about this concrete structure, but for the TV staff who have worked there and whom it symbolised everything glamourous about television, will miss it and feel a slight tinge of sadness when those three white blocks with black Gill Sans letters are removed from the side of studio 1.

It IS television in the UK.

It's not the first purpose built television studios ever, that honour went to Granada Television on Quay Street in Manchester (currently being vacated), not the first studios specifically built for colour television, that went to Southern Television in Southampton (sold, demolished, site redeveloped), but the first television village. Everything you needed under one roof and designed as such.

Much has been written about the design of the building so I won't go over old ground but I have never worked in another studio that has had the same feeling and aura about it. When I first got my job at BBC Television in the late 80's TV Centre was always the place to aim for. Every time I got to go there I would get a flutter of excitement as I walked through the reception doors. It still makes me feel like that today. I will always find an excuse to go to TVC whenever I am in London, much to the annoyance of the present (and former) Mrs. J!

The plan of TVC published in 1958

So what does it mean for the BBC? Well it means they will no longer have their own dedicated studio space in London. Their studios at Elstree will be the only network capable studio centre close to London. The New Broadcasting House in central London has two new tv studios but they will be in constant use for news programmes and they're not designed for 'real' television shows.

I can hear Teddington Studios and London Studios hastily revising their studio rate card as we speak because one day soon after the keys to TVC have been handed over someone high up in the BBC will suddenly sit bolt up right in bed, covered in cold sweat and scream "FUCK.... WE HAVEN'T GOT ANY STUDIOS IN LONDON ANYMORE!"

"WHAT HAVE WE DONE???"

Although studio production is not as prevalent as it once was there is still a need for a studio facility. It's not just the four sound proof walls and the lighting, it's also the peripherals, like editing, office space, make up, scenic services. Television Centre has it all, and all of it so well designed that it would be the envy of any television company that built it today.

Sure, the BBC can book studios at LWT, Teddington or Pinewood but they will have to pay commercial prices to make their own programmes. It'll be like Producer Choice all over again! Remember that kids? Producer Choice was the brainchild of one Mr. J Birt. He sold off assets and made the BBC more commercial and opened up the studios to outside productions. The trouble was that BBC producers couldn't afford to shoot their BBC shows in a BBC studio anymore so they went off site with their BBC money and spent it in cheaper commercial facilities. It took a long time for BBC producers to come back to TVC and shoot there again and use the best facilities and crews in the industry. Trouble was, the studios weren't getting work, so the crews got laid off.. a vicious circle starts.

Hello..? Can someone shoot me a sitcom...?? Hello..??

My sources told me that one of the preferred bidders in the sale process was a company called... wait for it.. BBC Studios & Post Production. Yes, the wholly owned subsidiary of the BBC was going to buy the site and keep it running as a BBC studio facility, just like it is now and continue running it to generate income for the rest of the BBC.

But it didn't win the bid.

So what is the future for Television Centre? I don't think its going to be as glittering as its past. And we'll never see the likes of this type of building again.

New Week, More Cameras

This is Liverpool calling... Liverpool, approximately 5048 miles from the Las Vegas Convention Centre.

That's where some of my colleagues (and a load of wannabes) are at the moment visiting NAB2012, the annual broadcast industry bun fight where new toys and equipment are demonstrated and released and cameramen and editors from all over the world look to spend money they haven't got on equipment they don't need for clients that don't care!

So far on Twitter people have been banging on about EOS-1D, 4K, 5D MkIII and 6K. All fawning over brand new cameras and shooting standards.... the 5D MkIII is THE camera to have... then it's not. You must have an EOS1D to succeed in the industry. Then you don't. You're a shit cameraman if you don't have Red Dragon... 4K is now sooooo last week and 6K is the way forward. Nothing will do now unless it's got a 6K image sensor.

Now, for those of you who aren't camera ops or the slightest bit technical I must explain that "K" is a resolution standard. Only last year 4K was often spoken of as the last ever resolution you will ever need. It's greater than the current high definition you watch at home by some considerable amount.

 

BTSL (big telly small living room) syndrome will afflict techno geeks for many years

But before you trundle your brand new HD telly into the back garden and rush out to Rumbelows to buy a newer one you need to understand that in order to fully appreciate 4K you would need to have a larger than 55" 4K tv in your living room and sit one and half times the screen height away from the screen... BUT so far there is no 4K domestic content. So the main use for 4K is for cinematic release.

Okay.. lets stop at 4K then... Everyone happy? Cue Red and their 6K sensor... oh for fu........ All the Twitter fanbois now bang on about how its going to revolutionise 'their' industry - everything will be clearer and crisper. It'll be like looking through a window when you go to the cinema... blah blah blah... "Now I can get realistic a film-look for my movies" was one of many Tweets that made my eyes roll into my head.

If you want a film look then SHOOT ON FUCKING FILM! (Eastman Kodak and Fujifilm are welcome to use that as an advertising slogan).

Anyway.. back to NAB. Just when you thought that the big guns had finished and the resolution battle had been won, this happened...

Wait... what..? Bollocks, where's that reciept for my EOS 1D...?

Out of nowhere Blackmagic Design launch the Blackmagic Cinema Camera. Is it 4K? Is it 6K?

No. It's 2.5K. That's the resolution AND the price. That noise you heard was the fanbois choking on their 4K/6K/Canon/Red wank-socks. Two and a half grand for a camera that can shoot above 2K resolution is quite an achievement and could possibly be the DSLR killer that Canon feared and it could knock a couple of other cameras off their perch.
The downside of something like this hitting the market is that it will become popular with "DoP's" who have just left college (don't get me started on that again) and feel that this will improve their work and they will be beating clients away because of the kit they have. It won't. If you are talented enough then it won't matter what you shoot on. Remember, Danny Boyle's "28 Days Later" was shot in standard definition on a Canon XL1.


Hey look everyone, I filmed a dog toffee at 6K... I'm greater than Kubrick now.

 I've said it before and I will keep saying it - camera ops and directors, learn your trade before you worry about what you shoot on. Only engineers and anoraks will really be able to see a difference between 2K and 4K. The viewers won't give a toss.

Content will always be king. Always.




Thought For The Day..

Television: it's called a medium because its neither rare nor well done.

Shit in a jiffy bag..?

Telly isn't all glamour, girls and car chases.. (or am I thinking of The Sweeney??) Sometimes you have fill out a silly amount of paperwork, forms and applications just to be able to do your job properly.

Today I have been told that I will be working at the Labour Party conference in Manchester at the beginning of October. No problem with that. It's my job.

In order to be granted the privilege of access to the conference I have to fill out a media accreditation form so that the nice people in Millbank can send me a plastic card with my name and picture on it and it means that I am no threat to national security or John Prescott.

I don't have a problem with form filling. I don't have a problem supplying a passport sized photograph on a light background showing a neutral facial expression with no reflection on my glasses. But I do have a problem supplying a whole host of personal information for no obvious reason to any political party.



Give us all your details and we still may not let you in...

This form asks for normal things like your name, job title, email address and contact number but it goes on to ask for your National Insurance number, your passport number, driving licence number, your last 3 years worth of addresses and even your personal car details.

Not a work vehicle that you are going to arrive in.

Your own car.

Yes... registration number, make, model and colour. The form even states that they require these details even if you are not going to drive it to the conference.

Am I applying for a mortgage here or a huge bank loan? No. I am going to provide news coverage of a load of geography teachers, Guardian readers and union activists having a week long jolly in Manchester. *I will also write sarcastic things about other parties as and when they annoy me.



Mr Milliband and Mrs Harman up for a right good Manc knees up


I know I need to be checked out for security purposes. I appreciate that, but I hold a UK Press card that is issued by the Association of Chief Police Officers which has all my details. You can even call the number on the back of the card which takes you through to Scotland Yard who can verify who I am and what I do. I also have a valid Criminal Record Bureau certificate showing that I have always been a good boy.

So why do I have to divulge so much personal information to Labour? Look again at the first picture and read the second paragraph. The details will be held on a Labour Party computer system. Why do they need to know so much about me? I'm not a member (of this or any other political organisation).

Correct me if I'm wrong but didn't they want to introduce a national ID card to the UK too?

If Big Brother is watching then he can help me hold the jiffy bag while I shit my stool sample into it so they can see if I'm eating the right diet to attend.

KEITH FOR BBC DG

Yes, you read it right.

I want to be the next Director General for the BBC and have today applied for the position. It's about time we had someone at the top who actually likes the BBC and will stand up for all departments, not just news.

Like Mitch Benn, I am proud of the BBC and I don't want it to be consigned to history as a former iconic brand.

I won't take the full salary that this post is entitled to. I'll stop the stupid amount of money wasted by the Corporation and I'll hope to raise the staff morale. I want the BBC to be a fun place to work at again. I want people to aspire to work for the Beeb and more importantly I want the viewers to want to watch the programmes we make and enjoy them.

It won't be a gravy train and some harsh decisions have to be made, but I think I can do it.

If you follow me on Twitter then I'll keep up with my DG election promises using the hastag #keithfordg and I will post more about what I would do over the next couple of blogs.

Is that the sound of Tweeps clicking "unfollow"?

TITANIC ANNIVERSARY

Its 100 years since the Titanic sank in the North Atlantic.

The band played on.

"Do you know we're sinking?" shouted the first officer.

"Piss off," said the Liverpudlian band leader. "We don't do requests."

Merseyfail

A nice relaxing Easter holiday and a reasonable drive from Leeds to Ormskirk started this week quite well. That was until Merseyrail spoilt it.

Now, I know things go wrong and railways are complicated things to run but they should remember that customers who use the service are using it for reason. We need to get from point A to point B with as little hassle as possible. So, when a part of the infrastructure fails you would expect an annoucement, a customer service agent with information and a viable alternative.

Not so today.

I got on the train at Town Green station. The electronic departures board stated the train was travelling to Liverpool Central, the front of the train said it was going to Liverpool Central, even the announcements on the train said it was going to Liverpool Central. So I kind of assumed that the final destination of the train was in fact Liverpool Central.

The train pulled away, stopped at the next stop, where more people boarded to go the Central. The announcement said Central, but one lady asked me if the train was going to Central as the station destination board said it was only going to Sandhills (which if you are not familiar with Merseyrail is some two stops further down the line). I assured her it was going to Central station, which was confirmed by the announcement on the train. Again the train pulled away and for the next two stops we were all fairly certain that the train was going to the destination we wanted.

Then, the announcement changed. The train was stopping at Sandhills. No explanation, no apology. There were some confused looking faces on the train. Was it stopping early or was it going to Central. The train arrived at Kirkdale were the guard announced that passengers should change here for services to Kirkby. The doors closed and the train pulled away as the guard announced that due to engineering work the train was terminating at the next station, Sandhills, were passengers should leave the train. A rail replacement service was in operation.

Quite rightly there was a lot of groaning and the odd expletive but we only needed to get the bus for two stops. A lot of people were annoyed that the announcement wasn't made earlier as they could have gotten off the train at earlier stops where it was easier to catch a bus into town.

What greeted us at Sandhills? A customer service agent? An apology? A notice board?

No. This.....

Passsengers for Liverpool.... a wheel barrow will arrive shortly.

The queue for the replacement bus (notice the use of the word in singularity) was massive. Up to 10 trains an hour stop at Sandhills on the way into Liverpool and they were all tipping their passengers off to wait for the replacement bus.

After 20 minutes of waiting and no sign of the bus I fought my way through the crowds and started walking the last 4 miles to work. Many other people had a similar idea.

One thing I did notice was the complete lack of anyone from Merseyrail with any information or an apology. That is absolutely appalling customer service. At the very least I would expect a company that I was purchasing a service from to have an explanation of why the service wasn't what was expected.

Even someone in a fluorescent jacket directing people to the bus would have been useful. At least then I could have asked how long the bus would take to arrive.

As I sit here typing this blog I am watching the Twitter feed of other disgruntled customers of the "urban network of vital importance to the transport infrastructure of Liverpool and Merseyside" venting their spleen and I notice that Merseyrail have only posted one reply.




Oh well, thats okay then...


What's that? You're sorry for the inconvenience? Your engineers are working to restore the service? You are putting on more than one 32 seater rail replacement bus?

Sorry, my mistake, I just assumed thats what you'd be saying to your customers.

A brave new world

Congratulations to my collegues back in Salford who succesfully launched Breakfast from studio SQ2 at MediaCityUK today.

It hasn't been easy getting Breakfast up and running from the north. New technology, new working practices and new staff all need time to bed in.

The gallery in SQ2 during the pilots

Some of my friends have questioned why there's only two cameramen for 7 studio cameras. The new studio is all automated and 5 of the 7 cameras are controlled by a system called Shotaque which enables the technical manager to change the shot size, height of the ped and pan/tilt using a operational panel infront of him in the gallery, rather than a phyical operator holding on tho the camera head in the studio.

As a cameraman I should be outraged that technology is taking over 'my' job. Yes, it is a bit annoying that every camera doesn't have a cameraman stood behind them, but as the presenters don't move from the sofa and the majority of the shots are either mid shots or wides I don't see the problem. The two cameras that do all the creative moves are operated by studio cameramen who use their skills to combine the track, zoom, focus and tilt. A good use of their time and skills in my opinion but not really justified for a camera that holds the same shot for three hours.

In the right hands a robotic camera system is virtually indistinguishable to the viewer from a traditional crew. Take a look at the output of Al Jazeera English (where I was the Head of Cameras & Lighting for a couple of years). They have 8 cameras in the news studio and four in the talks studio. Only one of them has an operator on the end of it. The other cameras are controlled by a cameraman sat in the gallery with the controls in front of him/her.


and they're off... Bill Turnbull and Susannah Reid with Breakfasts' first TX from Salford

 I've probably offended some studio cameramen out there with these comments but this is the future of television news I'm afraid....

In fact it's not the future at all. BBC News have nearly always used robotic cameras - even back in the days when the national news came from Lime Grove (where they used bloody awful Bosch/Fernseh cameras and Marconi MkVII's before that).

The thing is, that if something amazingly complicated came into the studio then all the cameras would have an operator with them. But how often would you have a 12 piece band followed by a breakdancing elephant followed by Oasis playing live?

You've paid how much...?

Kodak: value for solving every photo flaw in history.... $0.

Instagram: value for re-introducing those flaws back into your photos... $1 Billion.

Easter holidays

The end of the week is here.. a loooooong weekend that involves chocolate, shit telly, more chocolate and traffic jams at shopping parks and play parks!

JnrCameradude is fit and well, his eye is much better. MsCameradude is at the age where it's uncool to spend anytime in the same room as her parents - I've also become "dad" rather than "daddy" which is a sure sign that the pre-teen hormones are beginning to course through her veins. Any time now she will stop speaking rationally and just grunt. Her hair will become greasy and spot detritus will cover the bathroom mirror. Then she'll start worrying about her appearance, the bathroom will always be occupied, her bedroom will be covered in clothes and smell like Lewis's perfume department - then boys will start paying her attention...

Anyway... I digress.

Building up to a rant...

I've got another two weeks left of my tour of duty in Liverpool before I start a stint on Breakfast and Newsround. I've decided not to drive into Liverpool while I'm there, so I'm using Merseyrail. It's the Scouse version of the tube - but people make eye contact and strangers speak to each other. I know. We're crazy up North. The journey takes half an hour and you pass through the middle of the Liverpool suburbs before going underground. I've done the journey hundreds of times when I used to live up here. Nothing has really changed but I find myself quietly fuming at something that I'd never noticed before.

Rubbish.

Strewn along the railway embankments.

Now don't get the wrong idea about me. I'm no environmentalist. I don't vote Green and I really couldn't give a fat shiny shite about the polar bears but the sight of all this rubbish is really bugging me to a point where I want to pull the emergency handle, stop the train and start throwing all the crap back over the fences into the ignorant twats gardens.

Take this picture for example:

Railway embankment shit.

It's garden rubbish and general crap that has just been thrown over the garden fence and on to the railway embankment. Why do people do this? Is it so difficult to dispose of it properly? Out of sight, out of mind seems to be the mentality here. Then I started noticing it in more and more places along the Northern Line. From Orrell Park to Kirkdale it seems that every third house just dispose of unwanted furniture, garden wicker shit, rubbish, toys and building crap over their back fence.

I had a look on Google Maps (other satellite imagery services are available) to see what road the houses where on and bugger me YOU CAN SEE PEOPLES SHIT FROM SPACE.

Space shit

It has really annoyed me. I was shocked at how much it angered me. Liverpool is my home town. It was the City of Culture, the gateway to America, the birth place of sixties music. It had the worlds largest dock, two of the greatest footy teams in the world (insert joke here about Liverpool/Everton and Liverpool/Everton reserves), its got two Cathedrals and two cracking radio stations (sorry to Radio Merseyside, but Radio City has always been my favourite since I was a kid. Long live Uncle Norm!).

It's by no means perfect - I like the rough edges and the unpredictability of the place but come on fellow Scousers - this is your home. Be proud of it. Stop giving other parts of the country the ammunition to put us down all the time. The Luftwaffe couldn't destroy Liverpool. Mrs Thatcher couldn't destroy Liverpool (despite her best efforts). Even Deggsy and his Militant council couldn't do it. But the city's own people seem to be happy to do it themselves.

We're just about to be inundated with thousands of people coming to the Grand National. They will see the same view out of the train window as I do. They will go back to other parts of the country thinking that the worlds greatest steeplechase is held in a shit hole.

Do the people of Kirkdale and Walton have any respect? From the look of it, no. They don't.

The Grand National - a BBC institution.

So this will be the last year that the National will be shown on the BBC. Channel Four have the rights to show it now. Another in a long line of sports that have fallen away from the BBC portfolio. 

Many moons ago when I was a trainee cameraman I was fortunate enough for my first outside broadcast to be part of the crew that worked on the National. I was given the chance to operate a camera all by myself as I had proved that I was a 'toplens' in the making!

I wanted to operate the camera that was on top of the Citroen that followed the horses, called the CRE.

The CRE - right, where's that risk assessment..?

The camera supervisor gave me camera four when he stopped laughing. So off I trotted to the camera four position, armed with my lunch, the form sheet and a determination that I was going to win a BAFTA for the best shot of the races' history.

I adjusted the controls to my Philips LDK5 camera and made sure that the friction on the pan and tilt head was just right. Not too tight, not too slack. I had a couple of races to practise on and everything was fine. I was up for it.

Then it was time. The eyes of the sporting world were on Aintree. 

The director started calling the shots. 

"FOUR NEXT!" came the call and I was ready. The horses filled my frame, in focus and steady. My cue light came on and my camera was live to world. I followed those horses like they had never been followed before.

And the BAFTA for best pan of a horse race goes to..

My pan, zoom and focus all flowed and then it was over. Camera 5 took over. 

I'd done it. Hell yeah.

I climbed down the scaffolding and started on my packed lunch. At that point I felt like the greatest cameraman in the world. I tucked into my sandwiches and can of Coke with a satisfied feeling.

"FOUR NEXT!" I heard on my radio. "FOUR.... FOUR... FRAME UP FOUR..."

That's my camera. 

I bolted up the scaffold, panned, zoomed, focused and missed the bloody mobile glue factory. Live on air. Grandstand viewers saw the floor, the sky, the arse end of a horse and then a super wide shot. 

Bollocks. No one told me the horses went round twice.

The Falklands 30th Anniversary

I can't believe that the Falklands conflict was 30 years ago this month. My brother-in-law was deployed there with 12 Air Defence Regiment, seconded to the Rapier missile battery. He travelled there with his battery along with the Welsh Guards aboard HMS Sir Gallahad. 

He made it off just minutes before it was hit by an Argentine missile.

Something that seems to be forgotten in the age of instant coverage and embedded news teams was the fact that back then there were only two camera crews covering the Falklands war. Micheal Nicholson was there with his ITN crew, while the BBC was serviced by the late Brian Hanrahan and his cameraman the late Bernard Hesketh.

Cameraman Bernard Hesketh, reporter Brian Hanrahan and sound recordist John Jockel

He was there and filming when my brother-in-laws ship was hit and filmed the aftermath of what was the largest loss of British troops during the conflict.

John Jockel and Bernard Hesketh arrive with British Troops at Port Stanley.

They didn't have the luxury of SNG trucks, transportable earth stations or laptop edits. He had to rely on the RAF flying his 16mm film and Betacam tape back to the UK. Yes, they had to post the footage back before it could be shown on the TV.

Imagine that now... I know news editors who would implode (and often do) if the latest shot of a perp leaving court isn't on his desktop milliseconds after it was shot.